I want to set my hair alight; is that weird?
-Yes, like you even have to ask
Well why?
-Why what? Why is it weird or why do you want to set your hair alight?
Both I guess
-Pick one and proceed, we don't have too much time. You already kept me awake 'til nearly 3am
Sorry, why is it weird?
-You already know the answer to that
Yeah I guess, just wanted a second opinion I guess
-You're talking to yourself, how many other opinions do you think you have?
I'm usually good at defeating my own arguments
-Stop being the poet;
I'm trying. Can I ask the other question then?
-Sorry kiddo, one question and you wasted it
Recorded at 2:43am
I keep forgetting how to ask myself easy questions like, why? Who reads and who listens to the beat without grasping anything. Click-two-three-four, Click-two-three-four, Click-Click-Click. (I never could count in time)
if I could be an incalculably small fraction of the human being you are, I'll die the happiest person in the world. I really love you and I hope you know it because I will probably never tell you and that breaks my goddamn heart everyday
I actually enjoy depression (or whatever this is called; self reflection, emotional masochism, boredom) sometimes anyway. It gives me a little time to just relax, put on a slow song, relax and not be questioned (or maybe that's because it's 3am and no one else is awake)
If I could be anything that you ever are, the self-less person that you are, hell I'm even glad to be a part of this; I just hope I don't fuck it up and disappoint you. I hope I can tell you that one day. I never did believe in god, but I'm happy you do. Guess I take some comfort in believing that life isn't just a test. (I should get a medal for quoting and remembering silly things. Hey, remember the time you spelled "medal" as "meddle". With you here I'm surprised I forget anything)
I like to dream about where you are in the world, what you're doing and who you hang about with when you're too busy with work. Who do you think of when you first wake up? What little thoughts trickle through you in that sleep filled phase of waking to up somewhere that feels a little different than when you left it to place you head in the stars. Too much noise, slightly too warm, a little too cold.
Guess that's enough for tonight.